The best thing we can do for ourselves is be honest and true. Who are we really? Think for a moment about the thoughts that rush through your head. What are they? Would you want the world to hear them? I know I certainly would not want the world to hear what I think. Matter of fact, I blab things out sometimes with much regret.
If the majority of your thoughts and feelings are negative, it is time for the truth list. The truth list is an amazing tool I came up with to help us see who we truly are inside and out. It brings us to the realization that we should not focus so much on everyone else, but ourselves. We can all fall into a funk at times. Certain issues and situations can really change us for the worst. A truth list should be done often. When I start noticing myself becoming a crab, I realize it is time to start looking into what is going on. You see, we can blame everyone in the world for our problems, but we are the cause at the end of the day. Who or what do you let affect who you are and why?
How it works
The truth list is something you do alone with just yourself. Get no one else involved in your list. Start thinking about the things that are running through your head. Write down all of the negative emotions you are feeling. If you died today, what impression would you leave on the people you surround yourself with? Would they have nice things to say about you? What are your good and bad qualities? What are your positive and negative emotions/thoughts? Use a piece of paper if you like (I often have a laundry list of things). This can become hurtful. When you see who you truly are, you often feel quite guilty about it. The goal here is honesty and truth with yourself. If you can not be true to yourself, you can not be true to anyone else.
Once you are done, feel good about the positive you found in yourself. Promise to continue those things.
Now, focus on the negatives. Think long and hard about why you feel that way and what you are going to do to change your behaviors and thoughts. For instance, I had a bout of jealousy for a while. I compared myself to everyone else’s success stories. I wanted to have what they had. It led me into a place of gossip and resentment toward people. I started arguing with others and having a bad mindset. None of it helped me with my current situation. I decided that I would no longer allow myself to fall into the trap of jealousy. Any time I started comparing myself to others, I brought it to an end. If I was comparing on social media, I shut it off and got busy doing other things. Think of ways you are going to shut down these behaviors and apply them.
I will drill this often, you can change any mindset you have. When you change negative patterns and behaviors, you will change for the better. You must realize that the majority of our problems are led by other people and situations, but it is up to us on how we will let it affect who we are. We are partially to blame for issues that arise.
As you begin to change, you may have some slip ups. Dust yourself off and move forward. The great thing about us is as long as we are living, we have a chance to start over. Sometimes it can be harder to change than others. You must keep pushing forward. It took me a few months to overcome my issues with jealousy. However, it was worth the effort. I no longer compare myself to others.
Self-focus is so much more important than focusing on other people. You can not change others. They have to want that for themselves. You can only change you.
A Inspirational Twist
I will say this often, I am no saint. Any time I discuss things from a Godly perspective, I want to make that known. My life is no better than yours. I have a lot of self focus I need to do as well.
The added thing I do with my truth list is pray and apply Biblical perspectives to it. When I am uncovering my truths, I begin to look keywords up in the Bible or I focus my study on those keywords. For instance, I mentioned jealousy before. I started looking up verses and Bible studies that focused on jealousy. You will be amazed about the truth that is contained in the Bible. There has not been one negative emotion that I have tried to tackle that is not mentioned in God’s word. A great way to look things up is to use the Olive tree app which is strictly the Bible or the Youversion Bible that is a Bible study guide. I tend to use both. Nothing will get you wanting to change more than reading what God has to say and praying about it.
My final words
Remember, a truth list is designed for you and you alone. It is not for anyone else other than God.
We all hit pitfalls from time to time no matter where we are in life. There are circumstances, situations, and people that will throw us for a loop. However, we cannot let it take us down a path of negativity. Negative mindsets do more harm than they do good. We can not change the world or the people in it. We can only make it better for ourselves. When we are self-focused instead of others focused, we can change at any time for the better. It can be challenging at times, but you will win in the end by promising yourself you will change for the better. When you fall, dust it off and try again.
With that being said, chin up my friends! Tackle your monsters and be the best you can be!